My body is throwing a midlife plot twist called menopause, and let me tell you—my skin didn’t get the memo. It’s itchy, flaky, and acting like it’s auditioning for a desert-themed drama.
This is my body’s way of saying, “Hey, remember me? Let’s reconnect.” So here I am, chasing down lotions, oils, and creams like a love-struck rom-com hero, ready to pamper every inch of this diva’s skin.
Turns out, menopause isn’t just about change—it’s about learning to treat this body with the tender, loving care it’s been craving all along.
Because you’re not here for the itch—you’re here to glow!
Let’s talk about Menopause, let us pause and reframe this sucker: Menopause, as a fiery goddess in a shimmering red gown, wreathed in waves of heat that pulsed around me like an aura. Wherever I walk, the temperature rises, leaving sweat-soaked foreheads and flustered faces in my wake. I don’t knock politely when I visit. I barge in, uninvited, at the most inconvenient moments—like when you’re sitting in a meeting or trying to sleep. My flames dance across your skin, turning your cheeks into a furnace. “I’m just here to remind you,” I whisper, “that you are a powerhouse of transformation, even if it feels like you’re melting.
In a world where complaints about the dating scene seem to echo from every corner, it’s easy to get discouraged. From “there aren’t any good men or women left” to “dating apps are just full of scammers,” the negativity can feel overwhelming. But what if the real issue isn’t the lack of suitable partners, but rather a lack of clarity on what we truly desire in a partner?
Let’s flip the script and inject some optimism into the dating landscape! Here’s the cheerful truth: there’s someone out there for everyone and finding them begins with knowing ourselves and what we want. So, let’s dive into the vibrant world of dating with a fresh perspective and a sprinkle of excitement!
Here are five delightful bullet points showcasing what we might desire in a partner:
1. Authenticity: We crave someone who isn’t afraid to be themselves, quirks and all. Authenticity is magnetic, drawing us closer to those who embrace their true selves and encourage us to do the same.
2. Kindness: A compassionate heart goes a long way. We’re attracted to partners who show empathy, generosity, and a genuine concern for others. Kindness is not just a trait; it’s a way of life that makes the journey of love sweeter.
3. Shared Values: While differences can be enriching, aligning on core values forms a sturdy foundation for a lasting relationship. Whether it’s integrity, honesty, or a passion for adventure, shared values create harmony and understanding.
4. Passion: There’s an undeniable spark when we’re with someone who ignites our passions and shares our enthusiasm for life. Whether it’s a shared hobby, a mutual love for travel, or a fiery ambition, passion fuels the flames of romance.
5. Emotional Intelligence: The ability to communicate openly, understand emotions, and navigate challenges gracefully is invaluable. We’re drawn to partners who possess emotional intelligence, fostering deeper connections and mutual growth.
Let’s talk about self-love, the secret ingredient that transforms the dating experience. When we love ourselves unconditionally, flaws and all, we radiate confidence and attract positivity into our lives. Instead of settling for a relationship as a placeholder, we embrace our worth and seek connections that set our souls on fire.
Picture this: you, confidently strolling through life, knowing exactly what you want and refusing to settle for anything less. You embrace each date as an opportunity to learn, grow, and maybe even discover a soulmate.
So, the next time you find yourself lamenting about the state of the dating world, remember this: the power to find love lies within you. Embrace your desires, love yourself fiercely, and trust that the universe has a beautiful love story in store just for you. Cheers to love, laughter, and happily ever afters!
In every moment, I choose to love myself completely, wholeheartedly, and unconditionally. I love myself just as I am.
This is a challenge I may find tricky at first. I may have an instinct to put the needs of others before myself. I make a conscious choice to always put myself first, and to show myself the same love, care, and attention that I do those around me.
There are many ways to love myself, and I embrace them all. I transform the language that I use to discuss my body and my mind. I ensure I address myself in a manner that is positive, uplifting and brings me joy.
I deserve to be spoken to with love and respect.
I choose to surround myself with those who understand my need for self-love. I am part of a tribe that focuses on positive energy, happiness, and living our best lives. These are qualities I embrace in my own life. I am worthy of love.
When I love myself, my love for others blossoms naturally. I am a beacon of love, warmth, and positivity.
Today, I choose to love myself. I see how important this is in helping me be the very best version of myself. I can share the power of this love with those around me when I choose to love myself.
Self-Reflection Questions:
1. Do I choose to consciously love myself every day?
2. What can I do to show myself the love I deserve?
3. What kind of language do I use when describing myself to others?
Strategies for Revitalizing Libido in Aging Women & MenStrategies for Revitalizing Libido in Aging Women & Men
The delightful dance of time! It seems like just yesterday we were young, wild, and carefree, and now… well, now we’re just a tad more seasoned, aren’t we? But hey, who says aging can’t be an adventure?
I stumbled upon this article the other day, all about the spicy topic of senior sexuality. But what got me is they mentioned – ages 50 plus! Now, when I think of seniors, my mind drifts back to my grandmother So, you can imagine my surprise when the term “senior” was thrown my way. Me? A senior? Ha,Ha!
But hey, let’s not get bogged down by those numbers the government likes to slap on us. Age is just a number, after all – a number we won’t let define us! Although, I wouldn’t say no to a little discount here and there, am I right? Lol
Now, let’s talk about the elephant in the room: as we gracefully mature (because let’s face it, we’re too fabulous to just ‘age’), our bodies and libidos decide to do a little dance of their own. It’s like they’re saying, “Hey there, we’ve been around the block a few times, let’s switch things up!” But fear not, my fellow adventurers, for this is not the end of the road – far from it!
Sure, things might not be as sprightly as they once were, but who says we can’t give ’em a run for their money? Our bodies may change, but our spirit remains ever vibrant! Besides, what’s life without a little challenge?
So, my dear friends, let’s embrace this journey with open arms. Who knows what exciting escapades await us around the corner? Whether it’s a saucy rendezvous or a thrilling new hobby, the world is our oyster, and we’re ready to crack it wide open!
And hey, if along the way we happen to stumble upon a sweet senior discount or two, well, who are we to refuse such delightful offerings? After all, a savvy adventurer knows how to make the most of every opportunity that comes their way.
Here are a couple of do’s you can incorporate into your life if you are facing some challenges:
Men:
Explore Sensual Activities: Instead of focusing solely on penetrative intercourse, couples can explore sensual activities that emphasize intimacy and pleasure, such as sensual massage, cuddling, kissing, or taking baths together. These activities can strengthen emotional bonds and enhance sexual satisfaction without the pressure of performance.
Communication and Fantasy Sharing: Open and honest communication about desires, fantasies, and preferences can ignite passion and creativity in the bedroom. Couples can explore each other’s fantasies and try role-playing, erotic storytelling, or watching erotic films together to spice up their sex life.
Experiment with New Techniques: Encourage couples to experiment with different sexual techniques, positions, or accessories that can enhance pleasure and excitement. Trying new things can reignite passion and curiosity, even if penetrative intercourse is not always possible.
Seek Professional Help: If low libido persists despite self-help strategies and lifestyle changes, encourage women to seek guidance from a sex therapist or counselor who specializes in sexual health. These professionals can provide individualized assessment and treatment to address underlying issues and improve sexual desire and satisfaction.
Focus on Sensory Stimulation: Engage the senses to heighten arousal and pleasure. Incorporate elements such as scented candles, soft music, luxurious fabrics, flavored lubricants, or aphrodisiac foods into intimate experiences to stimulate the senses and create a more sensual atmosphere.
Women:
Consult with a Healthcare Provider: Women experiencing low libido should consult with a healthcare provider, such as a gynecologist or primary care physician, to rule out any underlying medical conditions contributing to decreased sexual desire. Conditions such as hormonal imbalances, thyroid disorders, menopause, or certain medications can affect libido and may require medical intervention.
Enhance Body Confidence: Aging can bring changes in body image and self-esteem, which can impact sexual desire. Encourage women to practice self-acceptance and focus on the aspects of themselves that they appreciate and enjoy. Engaging in activities that promote body positivity, such as exercise, self-care rituals, or spending time with supportive friends, can help boost confidence and sexual self-esteem.
Address Sexual Pain or Discomfort: Physical discomfort during sex, such as vaginal dryness or pain, can contribute to decreased libido. Recommend using lubricants or vaginal moisturizers to alleviate dryness and discomfort and encourage women to speak with their healthcare provider about treatments for conditions such as vaginal atrophy or pelvic floor dysfunction.
Explore Erotic Literature or Media: Reading erotic literature, watching erotic films, or exploring online resources can help stimulate arousal and imagination. Encourage women to explore their fantasies and desires in a safe and consensual manner, either alone or with a partner.
Embrace Non-Sexual Intimacy: Intimacy is not limited to sexual activity. Encourage women to cultivate emotional closeness and connection with their partner through non-sexual activities such as cuddling, hugging, kissing, or engaging in meaningful conversations. Building intimacy outside of the bedroom can help foster a deeper connection and increase the desire for sexual intimacy.
At the end of the day, we have to learn the art of Intimacy (The art of touch) being present asking the right questions, and seeking answers!
In today’s world, discussions about gender roles and relationships often stir up passionate debates and differing opinions. I recently found myself immersed in one such conversation while listening to a friend’s podcast. She was delving into the concept of female submission within relationships, advocating for the idea that allowing the masculine energy to lead can be a powerful and fulfilling choice for women. As I reflected on her words, I couldn’t help but find resonance in my own life.
The notion of submission, particularly in the context of a romantic relationship, tends to be a loaded and misunderstood one. Many people immediately associate it with a domineering “do as I say” attitude, an image that understandably raises concerns and resistance. However, my friend’s podcast made me realize that the true essence of submission when approached with balance and mutual understanding, can lead to a more harmonious and enriching connection between partners.
I consider myself a submissive woman, but it’s essential to emphasize that my submission comes with conditions. It’s not about blindly following orders or suppressing my own desires and needs. Instead, it’s a conscious choice to allow my partner to take the lead, provided he understands the delicate dance of balancing his masculine and feminine energies. In such a relationship, the phrase “your wish is my command” takes on a different meaning altogether. It becomes a beautiful expression of love, trust, and mutual respect.
For me, being submissive means allowing my partner to guide our journey together. It’s about recognizing his strengths and valuing his wisdom, just as I hope he recognizes mine. It doesn’t diminish my independence or intelligence but rather complements them. This form of submission is not about relinquishing power but sharing it, creating a partnership where both partners bring their unique qualities to the table.
The misconception surrounding submission arises from a failure to grasp its true essence. It’s not about one person wielding authority over another; it’s about nurturing a connection based on authenticity and trust. Sadly, societal conditioning often pushes us into survival mode, where we become hardened, protecting ourselves from vulnerability and the potential for heartache. In this survival mindset, we might perceive submission as a weakness when, in reality, it requires incredible strength to be vulnerable and open in a relationship.
In our quest for equality, we sometimes forget that equal does not mean identical. Men and women are inherently different, not just biologically but also in the energies they bring to a relationship. By embracing our femininity and allowing our partners to embrace their masculinity, we can create a beautiful synergy where each person’s strengths are celebrated.
I have found that submission, when done right, fosters a deep sense of intimacy. It’s about surrendering the need to control every aspect of the relationship and instead, letting love and connection flourish. It’s about communicating openly, setting boundaries, and understanding that both partners have an equal say in shaping the partnership’s direction.
In conclusion, I believe that the word “submission” should not be feared or dismissed based on its dictionary definition. It’s a concept that can be redefined and molded to fit the unique dynamics of each relationship. My personal journey has taught me that submission, when embraced with conditions that promote balance and mutual respect, can be a powerful force for building a strong, loving, and harmonious connection. It’s a choice I make willingly, with my heart wide open, because I understand that true submission is not about losing oneself but about discovering a deeper, more authentic love.
In a world that often places a heavy emphasis on traditional gender roles and expectations, it’s crucial to recognize that men, just like women, need intimacy and emotional connection. The misconception that men are impervious to emotions or are solely focused on being providers has long overshadowed the fact that they too experience a wide spectrum of feelings and desires. It’s time to debunk these stereotypes and explore why men need intimacy and emotional connection just as much as anyone else.
During a heartfelt conversation with my partner, the significance of this revelation truly struck me. He candidly expressed that men often yearn for intimacy and the ability to openly show their emotions, yet they often struggle with how to navigate this territory. It’s easy to forget that men experience hurt, joy, fear, and love just like women do. The societal conditioning that emphasizes emotional restraint and detachment has led to a situation where men may not feel entirely comfortable expressing their vulnerabilities.
We, as partners, have an essential role to play in addressing this imbalance. It’s our responsibility to create a safe and accepting space where men can authentically reveal their emotions without fear of judgment. While they may have been raised with the notion of being strong and stoic, it’s important to encourage an environment where they can freely express their feelings, thoughts, and concerns.
One crucial step in this journey is communication. As partners, we should actively engage in open and honest discussions about desires, both within and beyond the confines of the bedroom. By taking the initiative to ask questions such as, “How can I make your day better?” or “What do you need emotionally?” we extend an invitation for men to articulate their needs and preferences. We must recognize that men are not immune to external pressures and internal struggles, and by demonstrating our willingness to listen and support, we can help alleviate some of the burdens they carry.
In our pursuit of fostering deeper intimacy, celebrating the positive aspects of our relationships becomes paramount. Rather than dwelling on past hurts and conflicts, we should strive to focus on the moments of joy, connection, and growth. This shift in perspective can infuse new life into our relationships and enable us to navigate challenges with a more constructive mindset.
Creating opportunities for intimacy is another fundamental aspect of nurturing emotional connections. These opportunities need not be grand gestures; even simple acts like setting aside quality time for meaningful conversations or engaging in shared hobbies can go a long way in fostering intimacy. By prioritizing these moments, we reinforce the idea that emotional connection is a vital component of our relationship’s foundation.
It’s crucial to understand that all relationships experience highs and lows. Accepting this reality and actively working through difficult moments is what strengthens the bond between partners. By embracing vulnerability and supporting one another during challenging times, we demonstrate our commitment to the relationship’s growth and resilience.
Learning about each other should be an ongoing process. As individuals evolve, so do their desires, dreams, and needs. Taking the time to understand these changes not only fosters intimacy but also enhances the overall connection between partners. Engaging in regular conversations about aspirations, fears, and future plans can help bridge emotional gaps and promote a deeper understanding of one another.
The belief that men are impervious to emotions or only seek physical connections is a misconception that needs to be shattered. Men, just like women, require emotional intimacy, vulnerability, and understanding. By creating a safe and non-judgmental environment, actively communicating, celebrating positivity, and embracing vulnerability, we can help men feel more empowered to express their emotions and nurture more profound connections in our relationships. Ultimately, it’s a joint effort that enables both partners to flourish emotionally, creating a bond that is not only resilient but also deeply fulfilling.
As a proud GenX’er, I never thought that menopause would become such a significant part of my life. It felt like a distant event that only happened to older women no I’m one. Little did I know that this transformative phase would knock on my door sooner than I anticipated. But I’ve come to realize that menopause isn’t a death sentence; instead, it’s a chance to shed my old skin and embrace a new beginning.
They say that cells regenerate every seven years, constantly renewing and building to replace damaged ones. In a way, menopause is like a reset button for our bodies, urging us to become better versions of ourselves. It’s a time to be accountable and listen to our body’s wants and needs.
Until recently, many of us, including myself, were unaware of what menopause truly entailed. We associated it with night sweats, fatigue, and dryness, but there’s so much more to it. After delving into extensive research, I came face to face with the true cause and effects of menopause, and it was eye-opening. It could make us feel less than ourselves if we don’t understand it and care for ourselves properly.
Sadly, menopause was never up for discussion in the generation before us. Just like puberty and sexual health were hush-hush topics back in the day, menopause remained hidden in the shadows. But it’s time to change that. Knowledge is power, and the more we understand about our bodies, the better we can navigate through this journey called menopause.
Interestingly, men experience their own version of menopause called Andropause, which is barely talked about as well. It’s essential to recognize that they too face some of the symptoms that women go through. So, ladies, take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this transformative journey.
One of the most common concerns my clients bring up is their sexual health and confidence during menopause. It’s perfectly normal to feel apprehensive and unsure during this period of change. But remember, confidence is a state of mind, and we must not compare our journey to anyone else’s.
Throughout this personal odyssey of menopause, I’ve learned to prioritize my sexual health. It’s vital to have open conversations with your partner and healthcare provider to address any concerns or issues. I discovered that there are numerous resources and solutions available to enhance sexual wellness during this time. From hormonal therapies to lubricants and more, there’s a myriad of options to explore.
Equally important is embracing the changes happening in our bodies and learning to love ourselves throughout the process. Menopause is not a sign of decline but a gateway to self-discovery and growth. By nurturing our bodies with healthy habits, exercise, and self-care, we can make this journey smoother and more empowering.
So, to all my fellow GenX’ers embarking on the menopausal journey, I say this: Embrace it with an open heart and a curious mind. Take the time to understand what your body needs and honor it with compassion. Seek support from those who have walked this path before you, and don’t be afraid to share your experiences with others.
Menopause is a personal story, unique to each one of us. Let’s break the silence and shatter the taboos surrounding this transformative phase. By doing so, we empower ourselves and future generations of women to approach menopause with grace, confidence, and a sense of adventure. Embrace the menopausal reset, for it holds the key to unleashing your full potential and living life to the fullest.
As a Jamaican Canadian who has called Canada home for more than half of my life, my journey has been filled with both joy and struggle. After over 20 plus years of marriage, my husband and I decided to part ways, leading me to start a new chapter of my life. Little did I know, this separation would become the start of the most transformative period of my life.
During my marriage, I often found myself consumed by anxiety, my body twitching uncontrollably, and tears flowing endlessly. While I sometimes understood the reasons behind these emotions, other times, they seemed inexplicable. I had unknowingly carried the burden of mental abuse and trauma throughout my relationship, believing it was something I had to endure. In silence, I internalized my feelings, fearing that no one would understand.
Being trapped in a cycle of people-pleasing and occasional outbursts became my norm, as I struggled with feelings of inadequacy. For years, I accepted feeling less than a woman, thinking that was the only reality available to me. I had witnessed the women I loved and trusted endure abuse and infidelity, and they chose to stay. I followed their example, believing the mantra that it was better to have 80% of a man than none at all.
It was three years after my separation that my healing journey truly began. Unbeknownst to me, I had been sabotaging myself for years, unaware of the patterns I had fallen into. Seeking guidance, I started counseling while simultaneously launching my own business, Savage Desires. This venture was born out of my quest to overcome my own sexual insecurities and discover pleasure through adult toys.
At Savage Desires, I sold countless adult toys and hosted Desires parties for women, where I taught them how to please their partners in every way, but I didn’t teach them how to ask for what they wanted. However, a pivotal moment arrived when a client confided in me, expressing her dissatisfaction despite using the toys. This sparked a realization deep within me, leading me to question my own fulfillment because I too was wondering what was next.
I recall having a conversation with someone and I started to tell her a story of my past relationship and she told me that I need healing and to seek counsel and as a Jamaican that wasn’t a thing, My ego was huge but it got chopped down fast I had so many questions, so I sought therapy to unravel the layers of my emotional journey. Through this process, I confronted tons of buried emotions and experiences buried deep in my subconscious. However, my greatest breakthrough occurred when I learned to listen to my body and embrace silence. In that transformative moment, everything changed.
My journey toward healing and self-discovery has been hard, but it has also been incredibly rewarding. I continue to work on myself, knowing that self-growth is a lifelong commitment. By sharing my story, I hope to inspire others to embark on their own journeys of healing and self-empowerment. Together, we can break free from the chains that bind us and embrace the freedom to live our lives authentically and fearlessly.
My coach changed my life so much, so I started my own practice and the healing journey of every person that I work with completes me, it’s so rewarding to see the smile, joy, and winning smiles on all the women I work with.
Sexy is a state of mind, it’s not about the shape of your body, or how People see you.
In a world that often equates sexiness with physical appearance, it’s essential to challenge this prevailing notion. Society bombards us with images of airbrushed models and the idea that only a specific body shape can be considered attractive. However, the truth is that being sexy is not solely determined by our physical attributes. It is a state of mind that transcends the boundaries of appearance and is more about self-confidence, attitude, and embracing one’s individuality. In this blog post, we will explore why sexy is indeed a state of mind, unaffected by societal standards or the opinions of others.
Self-Confidence and Self-Acceptance:
Feeling sexy begins with self-confidence and self-acceptance. It’s about embracing and loving yourself, regardless of your body shape, size, or physical features. When you feel comfortable in your own skin and radiate self-assurance, others are naturally drawn to your charisma and energy. True sexiness comes from within, and it is rooted in accepting and celebrating your unique attributes.
Attitude and Personality:
One’s attitude and personality play a crucial role in determining sexiness. It’s not about conforming to a specific mold but rather about being authentic and genuine. A person with a positive outlook, a sense of humor, and a kind heart exude a magnetic charm that goes beyond physical appearance. It’s the way they carry themselves, their confidence, and their ability to make others feel comfortable that makes them truly attractive.
Embracing Individuality:
Every person is unique, and embracing one’s individuality is the essence of sexiness. Instead of striving to fit into society’s narrow definition of beauty, celebrate what makes you different. When you are true to yourself and express your personality, passions, and interests, you become irresistible. Being sexy means embracing your quirks, flaws, and imperfections, as they contribute to your distinctive allure.
Emotional Intelligence and Connection:
Sexy goes beyond the physical realm and delves into emotional intelligence and the ability to connect with others. It’s about being present, empathetic, and understanding. When you genuinely listen and engage with people, they feel valued and appreciated, which fosters a deep sense of attraction. Emotional intelligence and the capacity for meaningful connections create an allure that surpasses any physical appearance.
Confidence in the Bedroom:
Sexiness also extends to the intimate sphere of our lives. Being comfortable and confident in the bedroom is not about conforming to societal expectations or trying to meet unrealistic standards. It’s about open communication, mutual respect, and embracing your desires and boundaries. True sexiness lies in the ability to connect intimately with a partner, creating an environment of trust, exploration, and pleasure.
In conclusion, it’s time to redefine what it means to be sexy. Sexy is not about conforming to societal beauty standards, obsessing over body shape, or seeking validation from others. It is a state of mind that stems from self-confidence, embracing individuality, and fostering meaningful connections. By shifting our focus away from external appearances and embracing our unique qualities, we can truly embody sexiness. Remember, sexy is a state of mind that belongs to everyone, and it’s time to celebrate our authentic selves. So, embrace your individuality, radiate self-confidence, and let your inner beauty shine. You are sexy, just the way you are.
