truama Archives - Donna Savage

As a proud GenX’er, I never thought that menopause would become such a significant part of my life. It felt like a distant event that only happened to older women no I’m one. Little did I know that this transformative phase would knock on my door sooner than I anticipated. But I’ve come to realize that menopause isn’t a death sentence; instead, it’s a chance to shed my old skin and embrace a new beginning.

They say that cells regenerate every seven years, constantly renewing and building to replace damaged ones. In a way, menopause is like a reset button for our bodies, urging us to become better versions of ourselves. It’s a time to be accountable and listen to our body’s wants and needs.

Until recently, many of us, including myself, were unaware of what menopause truly entailed. We associated it with night sweats, fatigue, and dryness, but there’s so much more to it. After delving into extensive research, I came face to face with the true cause and effects of menopause, and it was eye-opening. It could make us feel less than ourselves if we don’t understand it and care for ourselves properly.

Sadly, menopause was never up for discussion in the generation before us. Just like puberty and sexual health were hush-hush topics back in the day, menopause remained hidden in the shadows. But it’s time to change that. Knowledge is power, and the more we understand about our bodies, the better we can navigate through this journey called menopause.

Interestingly, men experience their own version of menopause called Andropause, which is barely talked about as well. It’s essential to recognize that they too face some of the symptoms that women go through. So, ladies, take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this transformative journey.

One of the most common concerns my clients bring up is their sexual health and confidence during menopause. It’s perfectly normal to feel apprehensive and unsure during this period of change. But remember, confidence is a state of mind, and we must not compare our journey to anyone else’s.

Throughout this personal odyssey of menopause, I’ve learned to prioritize my sexual health. It’s vital to have open conversations with your partner and healthcare provider to address any concerns or issues. I discovered that there are numerous resources and solutions available to enhance sexual wellness during this time. From hormonal therapies to lubricants and more, there’s a myriad of options to explore.

Equally important is embracing the changes happening in our bodies and learning to love ourselves throughout the process. Menopause is not a sign of decline but a gateway to self-discovery and growth. By nurturing our bodies with healthy habits, exercise, and self-care, we can make this journey smoother and more empowering.

So, to all my fellow GenX’ers embarking on the menopausal journey, I say this: Embrace it with an open heart and a curious mind. Take the time to understand what your body needs and honor it with compassion. Seek support from those who have walked this path before you, and don’t be afraid to share your experiences with others.

Menopause is a personal story, unique to each one of us. Let’s break the silence and shatter the taboos surrounding this transformative phase. By doing so, we empower ourselves and future generations of women to approach menopause with grace, confidence, and a sense of adventure. Embrace the menopausal reset, for it holds the key to unleashing your full potential and living life to the fullest.

As a Jamaican Canadian who has called Canada home for more than half of my life, my journey has been filled with both joy and struggle. After over 20 plus years of marriage, my husband and I decided to part ways, leading me to start a new chapter of my life. Little did I know, this separation would become the start of the most transformative period of my life.

During my marriage, I often found myself consumed by anxiety, my body twitching uncontrollably, and tears flowing endlessly. While I sometimes understood the reasons behind these emotions, other times, they seemed inexplicable. I had unknowingly carried the burden of mental abuse and trauma throughout my relationship, believing it was something I had to endure. In silence, I internalized my feelings, fearing that no one would understand.

Being trapped in a cycle of people-pleasing and occasional outbursts became my norm, as I struggled with feelings of inadequacy. For years, I accepted feeling less than a woman, thinking that was the only reality available to me. I had witnessed the women I loved and trusted endure abuse and infidelity, and they chose to stay. I followed their example, believing the mantra that it was better to have 80% of a man than none at all.

It was three years after my separation that my healing journey truly began. Unbeknownst to me, I had been sabotaging myself for years, unaware of the patterns I had fallen into. Seeking guidance, I started counseling while simultaneously launching my own business, Savage Desires. This venture was born out of my quest to overcome my own sexual insecurities and discover pleasure through adult toys.

At Savage Desires, I sold countless adult toys and hosted Desires parties for women, where I taught them how to please their partners in every way, but I didn’t teach them how to ask for what they wanted. However, a pivotal moment arrived when a client confided in me, expressing her dissatisfaction despite using the toys. This sparked a realization deep within me, leading me to question my own fulfillment because I too was wondering what was next.

I recall having a conversation with someone and I started to tell her a story of my past relationship and she told me that I need healing and to seek counsel and as a Jamaican that wasn’t a thing, My ego was huge but it got chopped down fast I had so many questions, so I sought therapy to unravel the layers of my emotional journey. Through this process, I confronted tons of buried emotions and experiences buried deep in my subconscious. However, my greatest breakthrough occurred when I learned to listen to my body and embrace silence. In that transformative moment, everything changed.

My journey toward healing and self-discovery has been hard, but it has also been incredibly rewarding. I continue to work on myself, knowing that self-growth is a lifelong commitment. By sharing my story, I hope to inspire others to embark on their own journeys of healing and self-empowerment. Together, we can break free from the chains that bind us and embrace the freedom to live our lives authentically and fearlessly.

My coach changed my life so much, so I started my own practice and the healing journey of every person that I work with completes me, it’s so rewarding to see the smile, joy, and winning smiles on all the women I work with.